Inverted: Insanity
by Sharingan-Youkai
Summary: First installment of the 'Inverted' series! Ichigo needs training to fight Aizen. Kisuke has just the person to train him in mind. Meet Kainen, Aizen's little brother. Careful though, he's just a little...deranged. Proof, that insanity runs in the family


**A/N ...I have no idea where this came from...**

**I do not own Bleach, I do however own my OC and his Zanpakut****ō****...**

**Summary: Ichigo needs training to fight Aizen. Kisuke has just the person to train him in mind. Meet Kainen, Aizen's little brother. Careful though, he's just a little...deranged.**

_Warnings for this installment: Swearing, violence, humor, OOC'ness, nudity and weirdness. This is crack...And slightly serious but mainly for shits and giggles._

_This does not follow the anime really... So instead of Ichigo going to Shinji and the other Vizards for training he goes somewhere else. -Grins evilly- hehehe._

* * *

_~Hows it hangin'?~ _Hichigo talking.

"Yo." Normal talking.

_"What's up?" _Thinking.

_**"It's raining again."**_Zangetsu/Other Zanpakutō

**"Food!" **Hollows talking.

_**"Fudge it!" **_'Released Kainen talking,' (You'll see)

_"'Fudge it', really?"_ Ichigo's inner world.

* * *

Kisuke eyed Ichigo thoughtfully from his place perched on a large rock in his underground basement/training room. The orange haired teen was trying to draw on his Hollow's mask and with it, its power. He wasn't getting very far. Kisuke whipped out his fan and absently aired his face as he hummed in thought. So far the teen could form the mask, but he couldn't hold onto it long enough for it to be effective.

Unless of course he planned on killing Aizen in less then five seconds...

Highly unlikely...

Impossible, in fact...

The blond ex-Shinigami Captain watched as Ichigo shouted in frustration and kicked the ground a few times before falling back onto his rear with a tired huff. Kisuke took that as his Que to hop off his perch and swagger his way towards the irate carrot-top.

"Mah, giving up already Ichigo?" he asked cheerfully. Ichigo glared at him.

"No! I'm just taking a break, is all. 'Sides, I've been at it for a whole week, and I can still barely hold onto that damned mask! Your not helping either, so what else am I supposed to do!" growled the teen. The anger from Ichigo went straight over Kisuke's head as he plopped himself onto the ground in front of the sweating Shinigami Substitute. They sat in silence for a moment as Ichigo regained his breath and Kisuke counted the scratches on Ichigo's forehead from where he had cut into his own skin trying to grab the mask. He hummed in thought again as he rolled Benihime in his hands.

"I'm not helping because I'm not sure how to. You forget Ichigo, I'm only a Shinigami, I have not a spot of Hollow in me, so I don't know what kind of trigger I'm looking for." He said. Ichigo scrubbed a hand through his bright hair.

"Yeah I know, it's just annoying me is all." he mumbled. Kisuke smiled blindingly behind his fan.

"Well, if you really, really, _really _want some help with your Hollow...I know a guy who can help." he hinted. Ichigo's face lit up immediately.

"You do? Awesome! Who is he? Can he really help? I gotta do this to beat Aizen, so he'll help right?" he asked enthusiastically. Kisuke fanned his face, hiding a nervous chuckle.

"Well...If we don't mention Aizen I'm sure he'll help." was his reply. Ichigo blinked.

"Why not mention Aizen?" asked Ichigo as he scratched his head. Kisuke exhaled loudly and snapped his fan shut.

"Because, the guy I'm talking about is Aizen's little brother..." he said quickly. Ichigo blinked at him.

"Huh?" was his genius reply. Kisuke smirked.

"You heard me, but other then that, he can help with your reiatsu troubles too. He's not really the patient sort, but I'm sure you'll keep up with his training regime." Kisuke chirped as he used Benihime to help him to his feet. Ichigo was still gaping.

"Aizen has a brother?" he asked, his voice a little higher then normal. Kisuke snickered inwardly.

"Indeed he does, but don't worry, Kainen is strictly neutral...Mostly." he mumbled the last part. Ichigo was still staring.

"_Aizen, _has a brother? A _little _brother?" he asked incredulously. Kisuke rolled his eyes under his hat before whacking the teen over the head with his trusty cane/zanpakutō.

"Yes, Ichigo, Aizen has a little brother. And his name is Kainen, and a quick word of caution, don't mention anything about killing Aizen. Sure, he won't care if you want to stab, poke, burn, humiliate, kick, slap or maim Aizen, but say anything about killing him and you'll be dead before you hit the ground." Kisuke chirped as he twirled Benihime while walking towards the ladder that lead up into his shop. Ichigo trailed behind, his face still a mask of confusion. "Oh and one more thing, don't stare, or say anything about his eyes." warned Kisuke as he jumped up onto the ladder. Ichigo blinked after him.

* * *

If there was one thing Kainen loved most about life, it was sleeping. Call him lazy, because really, he was. He slept every chance he got, for the plain and simple fact that he could, and indeed would when given half a minute to himself. Now, most men his age (Well, maybe not, since he was over 600 years old) would be out chasing beautiful women or getting drunk in some bar or casino. Not Kainen, no, he would be curled up in bed, or snoring on his sofa.

Now, he was currently curled up in his comfy bed, head buried under a mountain of pillows and the only thing covering him was a plain black sheet that was in the process of slipping off his bare arse. The curtains next to his bed were shut tight, keeping out any and all evil light and his alarm clock was about three stories down somewhere on the street. All was right in the world.

Well, it was until something rather hard started insistently poking his right side.

He groaned and made a pitiful attempt to smack away whatever was jabbing him so rudely into the world of wakefulness. He heard a muffled snicker and he popped open a single inverted eye under his mountain of pillows.

He knew that snicker.

When what he was sure was a cane/zanpakutō jabbed his side again he whipped his arm (buried under his pillows) out, unsheathing his own zanpakutō (Also buried under the pillows, call him lazy _and _paranoid) in the process and held it rather impressively to the perpetrators throat, all without removing his head from his pillows.

"Poke me one more time, I dare you." Was his severely muffled threat. Of course, it being so muffled and pitiful sounding drowned out any actual threat in his words. The perp only laughed louder and jabbed him again.

"Come on, Kainen, rise and shine! It's well into the morning now, nearly noon! I got someone here I want you to meet!" chirped none other then Kisuke Urahara as he swept across the small bed room and whipped open the curtains.

Kainen, who had unburied his head for a moment to glare at the blond hissed and covered his head again as sunlight streamed straight onto his bed and in his face. Kisuke tutted and grabbed the sheets before yanking them off. A silent moment passed, before the blond snorted and whistled. Kainen felt oddly cold.

"Lucky I left the strawberry in the lounge..." muttered Kisuke as he dropped the sheet to the floor. Kainen snorted and groaned under his mountain of pillows and lowered his soul cutter to the floor, before dropping it with a clatter.

"How did you get in? I'm sure I locked the door." Kainen mumbled as he unburied his head again and glared tiredly at the blond. Kisuke raised a brow and twirled Benihime.

"I'm your land lord, I have a key, duh." he snorted. Kainen sighed and dropped his head back onto his pillows, not caring in the least that his arse was bare to the world.

"Who did you leave in my lounge, old man?" asked Kainen. Kisuke clicked his heels together and about faced.

"Your new student of course! He's got some inner Hollow problems that he needs help getting a handle on." Kisuke answered. "So, get up, get dressed and we'll be heading out." with that, the blond exited the room and closed the door behind him.

Kainen groaned. "Why me?" he muttered as he rolled out of bed and sleepily dressed. A moment later he exited his room clad in a pair of tight black jeans half covered by a pair of knee high leather combat boots with silver clasps. His torso was covered by a black long sleeved dressed shirt with the first three buttons left undone, showing the top part of his chest. His Zanpakutō was easily slid through the plain black belt around his waist and left to hang at his side. Lower back length brown hair was tied in a loose braid while shorter strands framed his sharp featured face.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and made his way to the lounge, where he found Kisuke meandering around in his kitchen, playing with his coffee machine while an orange haired teen sat bored on his sofa. The second the teen caught sight of him he gave a shocked yell and fell sideways off the sofa and hit the floor with a hard thud. Kainen rolled his inverted eyes and made his way to his kitchen, where he proceeded to chase Kisuke away from his precious coffee machine with a frying pan.

A moment later the teen jumped up and pointed at him. "What the hell!" he shouted elegantly. Kainen arched a brow and blinked. Kisuke glanced between them and Ichigo sputtered. "Your eyes, what the hell is up with your eyes!" exclaimed the orange haired teen. Kainen gave a long, slow blink while the sound of someones palm connecting with their forehead was heard. Kainen did not reply, and instead set about pouring himself a cup of coffee. Why coffee? Because he despised tea. It was weak, had a funky taste and it didn't give him any sort of buzz like coffee did. How his brother could be obsessed with it, he would never know.

Another minute passed by before the carrot top realized his question had been ignored.

Kainen slipped his coffee slowly, and didn't even acknowledge he had company until he was half way through it. When he finally set the half empty mug down Kisuke, who had known he wouldn't speak until he'd had his coffee straightened up off the wall by the counter and clapped his hands to gain attention. His forehead, under his hat, was suspiciously red.

"Ok, introductions! Ichigo, this is Sousuke Kainen! Kainen, this is your new victi- I'm sorry, student, Kurosaki Ichigo!" finished the far too cheerful green hatted blond. Ichigo scowled at Kainen, who sipped his coffee in response. Ichigo growled and folded his arms in annoyance at being ignored. Kainen, after a long silence deposited his mug in the sink and about faced with a hand on his soul cutter.

"Right," he started and turned to Kisuke. "Your place or mine?" he asked, causing Ichigo to gape. Kisuke stuck his finger to his chin and hummed.

"Yours, my poor room has taken enough damage for one week." he said. Kainen nodded.

"This way then." he said and exited the lounge and made his way back down the hall, where he disappeared into what looked like a broom closet. Kisuke followed right behind him and he too disappeared. Ichigo stood in the doorway of the small broom closet and sputtered.

"W-what the hell? Where did they go?" he asked as he scanned the very small and very cramped room. There was a broom and mop in one corner, a small cot propped against the wall and a single, full length mirror on the wall directly in front of him. He stared at the mirror, and his reflection stared back. Ichigo scratched his head, but yelped as his reflection suddenly ripped and a _hand shot out of the mirror _to grab hold of his shirt, where it proceeded to drag him through the reflective surface.

* * *

On the other side, Ichigo tripped and face planted into the ground, getting a mouthful of warm sand. He gagged and jumped up, spitting sand from his mouth as he dusted himself off. "What the hell!" he shouted as he span around on the spot, taking in the sudden change in scenery.

"Welcome!" called a sudden voice, and Ichigo whipped around and spotted Kisuke sat on a nearby rock while Kainen gestured around with his arms spread wide. "To my very own training room, and your new hell." finished the Aizen look alike. While Kainen did indeed look very much like his older brother, he still looked like a completely different man. The eyes only added to it. Ichigo stared into Kainen's gold on black eyes and shuddered as he was reminded eerily of his own inner Hollow. Kainen only smirked darkly at him in response. "I suggest you get ready, your torture starts in five minutes." said the brunette as he lent back onto a large lopsided rock, his inverted eyes watching his every move with an intensity that sent another shudder up Ichigo's spine.

Ichigo took the time to look around, and what he found made him gape. This so called 'training room' was nothing like Kisuke's. For one, to get in you had to _walk through a mirror! _Two, there was no source of light visible, but somehow he could see everything as if it were day. The sky was pitch black, no stars and no moon. The terrain seemed to vary in distance. Currently they were in what appeared to be a 'flat zone', which was just flat white sand for about two miles in every direction. A few large and small rocks dotted the area. In the distance were tall white sand dunes and further beyond that, he could see what looked like massive mountains, or rock formations looming on the horizon. It was eerily similar to Hueco Mundo.

Turning around, Ichigo was mildly alarmed to not find the mirror he had just stepped through, only more sand. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Kainen spoke again.

"That's the catch, none of us leave this room until you pass my training." he said. Ichigo frowned, but nodded, having done something similar with Kisuke's training. Kainen raised his right hand and glanced at his wrist, as if checking the time. A sharp grin made it's way onto his lips. "Well, looks like times up, hope your ready." He wasn't wearing a watch. Gold on black eyes flicked up to him, and that was all the warning he got before he was suddenly struck in the forehead by the end of Kisuke's cane and his soul was separated from his body. The blond was quick to drag his body to safety. "And we start in, 3-" Ichigo sputtered.

"What? You haven't even told me what do to yet!" he shouted. Kainen smirked.

"2-" Ichigo hurriedly drew Zangetsu.

"What am I doing? Tell me damn it!"

"1-" Ichigo was sweating slightly.

"Hey, I thought this was training, you haven't even told me what I'm meant to be doing!" He yelled frantically as Kainen straightened and drew his zanpakutō.

"0." And then Ichigo was on his back. Kainen's gold on black eyes came into his spinning line of sight as he groaned. "...You pansy!" Was all he heard before darkness took him.

* * *

Kainen blinked down at the now unconscious teen incredulously, then turned to Kisuke. "What the hell?" he asked the snickering blond. Kisuke tilted his head back as he snorted.

"Reiatsu overload I'd say." he said. Kainen blinked.

"I thought you said you'd trained him?" asked the blinking brunette.

"I have. But he needs help controlling his Hollow." replied the blond. Kainen narrowed his inverted eyes.

"One doesn't control a Hollow, Kisuke. So shut up, your supposed to be a genius. But that aside," snapped the brunette as he crouched down beside the teen. He titled his head. "I only leaked a little of my reiatsu...I was sure he could have handled it..." he mumbled as he poked the teens still scowling forehead. Kisuke shrugged.

"He's got a lot of reiatsu himself, and he's fought several Captain level Shinigami and some Arrancar, but he hasn't come across anyone with your kind of reiatsu. You forget, Kainen, your special." drawled the blond. Kainen twitched at the word 'special'.

"I hate that word." he muttered sourly. Kisuke scratched under his hat.

"Your reiatsu is a perfect mix of Hollow and Shinigami. Ichigo has met and fought a few Arrancar, and even some Vizards, but you are neither." started the blond. Kainen rolled his eyes and mouthed the words as Kisuke said them, having heard them a hundred and one times before. "Whatever the Hougyoku did to you somehow gave you the power of a Hollow, and melded it with your Shinigami powers, creating the perfect 'hybrid' if you will. While smiler to a Vizard, you do not have to fight for control of your Hollow all the time. Because you are your Hollow, and you are a Shinigami. Also like Aizen's Espada, but you have no mask fragment or Hollow hole." recited the blond. Kainen's brow twitched.

"I think I know all of that, old man, considering its, you know _me we're talking about!_" he said tartly. Kisuke smiled cheekily.

"I know, but its fun repeating myself." He chirped. Kainen scowled.

"Hundreds of times." he mumbled. Kisuke ignored him in favour of slapping Ichigo awake. While the blond went about that task, Kainen stood and made his way back to his rock with his zanpakutō in hand. "Like I don't already know all that crap." He spat. He watched as Kisuke brought Ichigo back into the realm of the conscious.

"Hehe, wait a go Ichigo." chirped the blond. Ichigo blinked as he rubbed his head.

"Argh, what happened?" he asked. Kisuke hummed.

"You went down like a sack of potatoes, thats what." he said cheerfully. Ichigo blinked.

"Huh?" He managed. Kisuke nodded.

"You got a taste of Kainen's reiatsu, and blacked out." he said. Ichigo groaned.

"Is that all? Damn. Then why do I feel like I went one on one with Kenpachi-" at the name, a sudden yelp was heard and both Shinigami turned to find Kainen on the floor with his hands over his head.

"Kenpachi, where!" he yelped frantically as he checked his training room. Ichigo stared and Kisuke shook his head.

"Relax, Kainen, Kenpachi's all the way up in Soul Society." called Kisuke. Kainen blinked, then jumped up and dusted himself off before clearing his throat and going back to leaning on his rock, as if nothing had happened. Ichigo couldn't bring himself to laugh at the man, because he himself would have done the same thing... Kisuke snorted. "Anyway." he said as he helped Ichigo to his feet. "Let's try this again. Kainen, stop trying to kill the kid." called Kisuke as he jumped back onto his rock. Kainen snorted and waved him off.

"I wasn't trying to kill him...really!" he called back. No one was convinced. Ichigo rolled up the sleeves of his Shinigami uniform.

"Enough screwing around, can we start or what!" snapped the carrot top. Kainen raised a slender brunette brow.

"Ok, sure. Seriously this time." he said as he sheathed his zanpakutō. Ichigo blinked in confusion. Kainen waved him off.

"Mah, put that away, you won't be needing it." he said as he pointed at Zangetsu. Ichigo blinked.

"Huh? But you said-"

"I was fucking with you, kid. S'what I do." Kainen said. Ichigo blanched, then scowled.

"Asshole." he mumbled as he stabbed Zangetsu into the ground and made his way forward to put some distance between them. Kainen nodded his head and lent his own blade against the rock.

"Ok, first things first, sit." he ordered. Ichigo blinked, but complied, sitting Indian style in the sand. Kainen plopped down in front of him. "Have you spoken to your Hollow yet?" he asked. Ichigo scowled and nodded. Kainen hummed. "Good, have you fought him?" he asked. Ichigo nodded again. Kainen raised a brow. "Well?" Ichigo blinked at him.

"Well what?" he asked sourly. Kainen sensed a sore point.

"He totally kicked your ass, didn't he?" he asked knowingly. Ichigo scowled.

"I got him in the end." he mumbled defensively. Kainen nodded.

"Ah-huh. Right." A long silence followed.

More silence.

Ichigo twitched.

"Well, what the hell am I supposed to be doing?" he snapped impatiently. Kainen shrugged.

"I haven't the foggiest." he said, smiling disarmingly. Ichigo shuddered at the look, reminded disturbingly of another Sousuke. Then registered what he said.

"What do you mean you 'haven't the foggiest'!" he shrieked as he jabbed a finger at Kainen, who leaned back and went cross eyed to see the finger nearly touching between his brows.

"I've never had to master my own Hollow, because I am my own Hollow. I don't have an 'alter ego' waiting to take over...That I know of." he muttered the last part. Ichigo blanched, then jumped up and pointed an accusing finger at Kisuke.

"You! You said he could help!" he shouted. Kisuke scratched his cheek.

"I did, didn't I?" He said absently. Kainen snorted.

"I can help, but not in the way you think." he said as he scratched under his chin while yawning. Ichigo rounded on him.

"Then how can you help?" he hissed in annoyance. Kainen gave him a slow blink.

"I can keep you restrained of course." he said as if it were obvious. Ichigo blinked.

"I'm not following you." he said flatly. Kainen rolled his inverted eyes skyward a moment, then heaved himself to his feet.

"What you need to do, kid-" He ignored the growl of 'I'm not a kid' and cracked his knuckles. Ichigo noticed for the first time that his nails were black and sharp. "Is let your Hollow out, and keep him out, while trying to reign him back in. You follow?" he asked. Ichigo frowned.

"That...made no sense." he said truthfully. Kainen shrugged.

"It's hard to explain. What you need to do is draw him out, all the way, until your sure he'll take you over completely." he said. Ichigo stared, looking slightly alarmed.

"Huh?" he asked shakily. Kainen rolled his eyes.

"Then you need to earn his respect by kicking his ass back where it belongs and taking your rightful place as the one in control, got it?" he asked. Ichigo nodded slowly.

"I think so...But what if I fail? He'll take over and go on a ramage!" he stressed as he pulled at his orange hair. Kainen, who was in the process of stretching his arms snorted.

"That's what I'm here for. To keep your and his arse in this room." he said. Ichigo eyed him dubiously. Kainen scowled.

"Hey." he said, insulted. Ichigo's lips twisted into a slight grimace.

"Do I really have to do this?" he asked. Kainen shook his head.

"Nope. No ones making you do anything. If you want to call it quits," he started as he snapped his fingers, and the mirror suddenly materialized right next to him. "Then the doors here." he finished. Ichigo sighed shakily.

"Fine, I'll do it. I have to." he said darkly. He had to, if he wanted to kill Aizen. Kainen narrowed gold on black eyes.

"Why do this, anyway? Why not go to those Vizards hiding in the storage district? Their methods are a helluva lot less dangerous then mine...I think." he said, scratching his head. Ichigo opened his mouth to answer, but stopped himself at the last second. Kainen noticed, and wasn't about to let it slide. Kisuke, on the other hand decided to save Ichigo from the oncoming grilling session.

"Hey, it's not the kids fault you live under a rock, Kainen." he started. "There's some bad things going on in Soul Society. There's even whispers of a war brewing. Surely you've heard something about that?" he asked, using his cane to prop his hat off his blue eyes. Kainen blinked incredulously at him.

"After all the crap those fuckers pulled, you expect me to give a flying shit what they do?" he asked, wide eyed. Kisuke nearly face palmed.

"Three Shinigami Captains went traitor and killed the Central 46. They've also began forming an army of powerful Hollows." he said. Kainen raised a brow as something hit him. He folded his arms and huffed.

"Let me guess." he started. "Aizen started it." he said. Kisuke blinked at him, shocked. Kainen took that as a confirmation and snorted. "Go figures." he said. "I am so telling mother." he mumbled. Ichigo stared at the hollow eyed brunette strangely. Kainen snorted and clapped his hands together. "And I'm willing to bet your training to take him out?" he asked as he raised a brow at Ichigo, who gulped at the dangerous gleam in the older males eyes.

"He's got to be stopped, he's lost it..." he tried. Kainen snorted again.

"Oh, I know he's insane, because you see, insanity runs in the family. Just ask my old man, he _did _butcher my mother in front of me when I was a chibi." he said, a dark smirk on his face. Ichigo gaped at him, and Kisuke slapped his forehead. Again.

"S-seriously?" sputtered Ichigo, horrified. Kainen stared at him a moment, then threw his head back and laughed. Ichigo was confused. Kainen regained his composure with a snicker.

"Seriously? No." he said simply. Ichigo scowled. "But it did serve to prove my own point eh?" he asked cheekily. Ichigo wanted to hit him.

"Can we just get this over with already?" he asked tiredly. Kainen shrugged.

"Sure." he said as he once again cracked his knuckles, quickly followed by his neck while he also rolled his shoulders. Ichigo gulped and sighed, closing his eyes to draw on his Hollow.

* * *

_Instantly, he found himself in his inner world. His inner Hollow was standing right in front of him, nose to nose._

_~Hiya there, King. Out for a stroll?~ The white haired double asked teasingly. Ichigo huffed and shoved the Hollow back._

_"I take it you know what's going on then?" he asked his inverted double. Hichigo snorted, then gave him a face splitting grin._

_~You are going down, King.~ he said gleefully. Ichigo swallowed thickly while in the distance, Zangetsu crouched on his pole while rubbing his face._

_**"This is going to get very messy."**__ he sighed as he eyed the approaching rain clouds. __**"I'm going to get wet again." **__he mumbled as he watched the Hollow throw himself into his wielder and suddenly the world shuddered as he proceeded to take Ichigo over._

_

* * *

_Back in the outside world, Kainen was watched his 'pupil' with an air of boredom. So far, the teen had just been standing there, eyes closed and apparently asleep on his feet. He sighed, already missing his comfy bed and his pillows. Suddenly he was nearly blown backwards by an explosion of reiatsu as Ichigo suddenly seemed to explode in a flash of black and white light. Kainen popped his lips.

"Now we're talking!" he crowed, ignoring Kisuke's curse as he was blown backwards off his rock. When the light finally died away, Kainen whistled at what was revealed. Where Ichigo had once been, now stood what could only be a Hollow. Bone white skin, hocked legs, a long, thick tail, powerful horns, a bright orange mane and a sharp toothed, red stripped mask greeted him. He raised a brow. "Not bad." he said gleefully as he saw the Hollow tensing to pounce. Suddenly the beast blasted forward with a burst of sonido, heading right for him. Almost lazily, Kainen shifted his weight slightly and snapped his hands out. A shock wave caused the sand around him to explode outward and Kisuke to whistle as he watched on from his reclaimed perch.

When the sand and dust settled again, Kainen stood with his booted feet dug into the sand, one foot behind him and the other bent at the knee in front of him while his hands gripped the strong horns before him. The Hollow snarled and tried to yank its head away from Kainen's hold. The brunette snorted and shifted his grip before bunching the muscles in his back to fling the roaring beast over his shoulder and into the rock he had been leaning on. The rock, of course shattered on impact while Kainen dusted his hands together absently.

The Hollow growled and hauled itself to its clawed feet, before a violent red light began to gather between its impressive horns. Kainen cocked his head to the side and grinned. "Oooh, shiny." he said as the Cero was fired right at him just as a shimmering gold and black light came into existence behind his back, where his hand was.

Kisuke, who had noticed the light behind Kainen paled. "Ah shit."

What followed, could only be described with one word.

_**Boom**._

_

* * *

_When the sand, dust, ash and smoke finally settled a massive crater was revealed, charred edged reaching from Kainen to the Hollow, both of whom were still standing. Kainen, who was stood with his hand outstretched with two black painted fingers pointed towards the horned Hollow snorted.

"Is that it?" he asked incredulously. The Hollow, in response dropped its tail with a thud and gave a short snort, its mask betraying its shock. Kainen dropped his hand and dusted his shirt off. "Dude, I've had gas with more effect than that." he said loudly. The Hollow blinked, then snarled in fury. Kainen grinned again as it prepared for another assault. Kainen bent his knees and clapped his hands between his thighs. "Naw, come 'ere boy, come on!" he taunted as he slapped his knees in a beckoning motion. The Hollow twitched, then roared before charging. Kainen merely clicked his tongue before allowing himself to be bowled over by 200 pounds of pissed off Hollow.

Kisuke shook his head from his perch, his singed hat atop his head as he dusted sand from his clothing. "Bloody Sousuke's, insane, the lot of them."

Kainen grappled with the enraged Hollow, its bone crushing grip on his hands not even making him twitch. He increased his own grip and shoved forward, causing the creature to slide back in the sand. The Hollow grunted and shoved in return, only succeeding in shoving him back a few inches. Kainen tutted. "You given up already Berry-boy? The whole point of this thing is to _gain back control_. You gone belly up already in there?" he asked tauntingly. The Hollow puffed hot air in his face. Kainen gagged. "Whoa, seriously, two words. Breath and Mint." he said before ramming his head into the mask in front of him, sending the creature flying back.

Kainen rubbed his forehead. "Huh, Aizen did always say I had a thick head...Guess he was right." he muttered absently as he blew a stray strand of hair from his face. Before he even finished that, he was once again bowled over. He wheezed as the air was knocked from his lungs as his back was slammed into the sand and 200 pounds of Hollow was slammed into his chest. Grimacing at the huge clawed foot pressing down on his ribcage, Kainen looked up into the cracked mask. "You should seriously lay off them man-burgers love, your getting fat." he said as he twisted the foot off his chest, causing the Hollow to snarl in pain. Jumping to his feet, Kainen used a quick burst of his own version of sonido to reappear behind the Hollow. He reached down and casual swiped up the swaying tail before tucking it under his arm. The Hollow froze and turned, eying him and its tail. Kainen's face threatened to split from the size of his grin. "Come on Barbie, let go for a ride." He said, before proceeding to use sonido to hurtle the poor Hollow all over the training room.

* * *

Kisuke yawned and flicked open his fan, lazily airing himself as he watched the white and black blurs zipping around and the random explosions of sand and rock. He pulled out his pocket watch (A gift from Yoruichi) and checked the time. He whistled and pocketed it again. Similar to his own training room, time passed differently in this one. While it had been about three hours in here, it had been roughly half an hour outside.

He winced when the Hollow-that-was-Ichigo was sent flying past him and into another rock, the force of the impact incinerating it. Kainen swaggered up to him with his hands in his pockets. "You know," he started conversationally as the Hollow tried to get back into its feet. "At this rate, I might just accidentally kill him." he said lightly as he scratched the side of his nose. Kisuke tutted.

"Please don't, Isshin will kick my arse if I don't return his son in one piece." He whined. Kainen snorted.

"Well, he better hurry up and take back control then shouldn't he?" replied Kainen as he dusted his shirt off, scowling at his missing left sleeve. "Awe man, this was my favorite shirt." he mumbled as he poked at a few claw shaped holes at the hem. Kisuke opened his mouth to comment, but was interrupted when the Hollow suddenly gave a screech, drawing their attention back to it as it grabbed hold of its own head and began thrashing around in the sand. Kainen sniffed. "'Bout damn time." he said, bored. They watched as the Hollow then proceeded to claw at its mask, its shrieks swapping between beastly and human.

Kainen sighed as the Hollow ceased its thrashing and rolled to its feet, mask still in tact. "Oh dear, seems I spoke too soon." he said, unconcernedly. Kisuke sighed and rubbed his face.

"Kainen." he groaned. Said Sousuke raised a brow in his direction.

"Don't 'Kainen' me, Urahara, I can't win this fight for him." he snapped. Kisuke groaned again. Kainen blinked. "Oh, he's spotted us, here we go again." he said gleefully as he prepared himself for another wrestling session with the local Hollow. The Hollow snarled, took one step forward and froze. Kainen felt a shift in the beats reiatsu and pouted. "Ah nuts, fun's over." he grouched just as the Hollow mask shattered and Ichigo fell over, 100% normal and also 100% nude. Kainen slapped his forehead. "Sheesh, its like prom all over again."

Kisuke choked.

* * *

**A/N Done! This was supposed to be a weird oneshot, but I'm extending it into a series, ok? So be on the look out for the next installment ok? Until then, REVIEW!**


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